Hello everybody, and welcome back to the one and only WCW Nitro Saga. Last week, we saw Hulk Hogan’s Lord of the Rings audition tape air live to the world, wherein that he challenged Sting to a match on this week’s edition of Nitro. Trust issues are extremely apparent in WCW over the past number of weeks, so let’s see if that trend continues tonight.
Due to a slight mixup, this should have gone up last week – so let’s pretend this is a little trip back in time!
When?: November 20, 1995
Where?: Macon Coliseum in Macon, Georgia
This is the first article I’m writing since the tragic news broke that Bobby The Brain Heenan passed away. So, I just wanted to take the time to say rest in peace to the single greatest pro wrestling manager of all time. Nobody did it better, and I’m not sure if anybody ever will. Everything he ever did was complete gold. Whether it was commentating with Gorilla Monsoon, making Andre The Giant seem even more larger than life, or making Mr. Perfect seem just that much more perfect. He was the mold that held a lot of things, and people, together. I had the honor of meeting Bobby back in 2012 and, although he couldn’t talk, you could tell he was enjoying every minute of life. There will never, ever, be another Bobby Heenan. So from this humanoid to a legend, thank you for the memories, Brain. I’ll never forget you.
This week for Nitro we’re in Macon Georgia, apparently. That’s if Eric Bischoff is not being a dirty liar once more. For real though, it appears we’re live again, which is cool. No more lies and other nonsense. We’ve got Bobby The Brain Heenan being great as he always was, we’ve got Mongo being the worst like he always is, and we’ve got Eric Bischoff still looking like he’s in a constant state of pissed-off-ness. I mean, what’s not to like about this show? These guys hype up Sting vs. Hulk Hogan as if that even needs hyping up. What really gets me about these old Nitros is Eric Bischoff saying things like “don’t even think about leaving us for one second, as you’re going to see -” blank blank. It’s like the 90s equivalent of when YouTubers go “don’t forget to like, comment, share, and subscribe for more content like this.” It’s like, please. Just stop. Although admittedly, I admire people who can shill themselves shamelessly like that. I myself can barely string an English sentence together without getting flustered. There’s a reason why I am a writer and not a YouTuber. Although I’m not very good at writing either… ANYWAY, that little thing from Bischoff bothers me. If the WWE Network had a dislike button, I’d dislike every Nitro where he says similar stuff. I am absolutely petty like that.
On with the show, we get a match graphic screen where Sting is looking like a lost member of the Headbangers, while Hogan is making a face like he just found out from Maury that the baby is indeed his. This is absolutely amazing. Look, I’ll grab a screenshot of it for everyone’s viewing pleasure.
As much as I hate to admit it, Hulk Hogan has absolutely been a highlight of these Nitros, even when it’s unintentional. For example, this is probably the doing of some intern at Turner Broadcasting who got told to put together the graphics for the show, like, an hour before it hit the air, but I’ll be damned if this isn’t one of the best things we’ll see tonight. If not THE very best thing we’ll see tonight. When we get back to the commentary table, we see and hear Eric Bischoff almost call Bobby Heenan “Mongo” which is quite frankly disgraceful. How dare you, Bischoff. Heenan then says that he’s rooting for Sting tonight. Against Hogan no matter what. You’ve gotta love it. I wish more commentators were like that. I know Corey Graves hates Elias even though they’re both heels, but I want, I don’t know, Byron Saxton, to be a fan of The Usos despite them being heels. It’s a little thing, yet it shows character and individualizes one commentator from the other. Bischoff says it’s time to crank things up, which I suppose means it’s time for our first match of the evening.
Scott Norton vs. The Shark
“For the love of God.” I say as I pause this episode to go and put my laundry in the dryer. I have nothing against Scott Norton or Earthquake, but this little feud these two are having is beyond pointless. Nobody cares, and quite frankly, The Shark is a joke. Earthquake was a talented big man, why he was subjected to being a god damn shark is anyone’s guess. I will admit however, I looked on Community Creations last night in WWE 2K17 for a Shark-attired Earthquake to download, with no success. Reason for that being that I started a WCW show in one of my Universe saves and wanted to keep it somewhat authentic. Nonetheless, if anybody reading this happens to play 2K17 on PC and makes a Shark outfit for Earthquake, let me know. I’ll be quite a happy camper.
The Shark is taking matters into his own hands here tonight Johnny, as he attacks Scott Norton while the latter is making his entrance. This is so 2K that I don’t think I can even handle it. This event also gets WCW enough XP to level up to “WCW Etiquette 2” which features more pre-match attacking, except now it doesn’t even have to be near ringside anymore! How lovely. WCW, we’ve got children in the audience. Set better examples goddammit. These two big boys brawl all up and down the ramp with punches and kicks, until eventually making their way to the ringside area, where Shark puts a stop to Scott Norton by slamming him shoulder first into the ring post. Shark rolls Norton into the ring where this match now officially begins. Norton gets to his feet, but then he quickly gets locked into what appears to be a bearhug. Oh no, please. I’m still having flashbacks to the clusterfuck with The YETAAAYYY and The Giant. When they humped Hulk Hogan. Eventually, Shark is able to turn that bearhug into a belly-to-belly suplex. It was very nice too, I’ve gotta say. Turn it up, give me some more.
Earthquake now with a huge elbow drop onto poor Scott Norton. Ouch. I’d hate to be on the receiving end of that. I’d imagine it’s quite painful. He follows that up with a knee to Norton’s midsection. Out of curiosity, I quickly went to check if there was a Shark CAW in the Fire Pro Wrestling World workshop on Steam, and there was. I also checked for Garrison Cade (don’t ask why), but unfortunately there wasn’t one for him. I did see Lance Cade, but no Garrison variation. Quite disappointing to be honest. Nonetheless, this match continues, with Scott Norton trying to make a comeback, punching Shark in the gut. This doesn’t last long, however, as Shark sends Norton into the corner, then connects with a Stinger Splash (or… a Sharky Splash?). Shark takes the time to pose for the crowd before continuing his assault. Meanwhile, Eazy E makes more comments about not leaving the channel and such. I feel like he’s personally challenging me now. Yes, I know this was recorded in 1995, but I can’t shake this feeling. He better not even try it ’cause I will… leave…. this video, and come back to it later. I WILL REVIEW RAW INSTEAD, DON’T TEST ME BISCHOFF.
Mr. Norton is now beginning to no-sell Shark’s forearms and other maneuvers. If he started throwing superkicks, I would have called him a Young Buck. We get some back and forth Irish whips until Shark goes chest first into the top turnbuckle. Norton follows that up by hitting him with a big suplex for the one, the two, and the three. Mercifully, this one is over.
Match Rating: No.
Shark/Norton matches are good for two things: getting things off my mind, and zoning out. As you can see, this article probably makes zero sense up to this point, and that’s quite alright, because nothing of true importance has happened yet. We know we’re all here to see Sting vs. Hogan, and maybe an Eddie Guerrero match if he’s on the card tonight. Okay, I’m done with my ranting. For now.
Eric Bischoff hits us with more of that “don’t leave us now” trash. Where am I gonna go, Eric? Huh? Answer that for me. Am I gonna go to the USA Network and watch Mantaur wrestle Man Mountain Rock? No, I’m not, because I don’t have cable. Not only that, but it’s also not 1995 anymore. If I’m tuning out of this show, I’m going to do so to watch House Hunters clips on YouTube. Eric’s got some nerve too, considering he’s telling us to not leave after he forced us to watch Scott Norton vs. The Motherfreaking Shark. This is borderline abusive. Nevertheless, we get a match graphic screen showing us that up next, Eddie Guerrero will go one-on-one with The Nature Boy, Ric Flair! Holy crap, talk about a 180 in terms of show quality.
See this? Look at Eddie and Ric, looking all normal. Nothing like that Sting/Hogan screen. After that commercial break, we’re greeted by Mean Gene, who’s standing on the entrance ramp along with Jimmy Hart and The Rubber Duck Kevin Sullivan. This ought to be good. Jimmy Hart goes on about how tonight is Sting’s night and tries to drive that wedge between Sting and Hogan bigger. He mentions how Hogan has a new best friend in the Macho Man Randy Savage, and how when The Hulkster went to go film Baywatch, he didn’t invite Sting, he invited Savage, despite Sting giving Hogan the stamp of approval in the WCW. They then show a clip of Hogan and Savage with some Baywatch girls. The 90s sucked. Uh-oh, Kevin Sullivan’s got the mic now. He’s talking about stuff and things. Things that I cannot be bothered to care about. We get it, Hulk messed up, he trusted Jimmy Hart, bad idea my guy, boohoo, Giant has the belt, now he doesn’t, World War 3. Got it. Sullivan not only looks like a little kid, but he also sounds like one as well. It’s the double whammy of can’t-take-you-seriously-ness. Taskmaster concludes his spiel, and then Mean Gene calls them two “the biggest pieces of garbage-.” Oh, my goodness. Mean Gene is out here being fearless. What a man.
Back at the commentary table, Bischoff asks how Hogan can trust Macho Man? Bobby Heenan replies saying Hogan doesn’t have a friend in the world, not even Savage. Mongo says something about Heenan’s opinions and his own feet both stinking, which causes The Brain to almost get out of his seat and attack. Dude, that would have been the best part of this show, hands down. Suddenly, some familiar music can be heard in the distance…. could it be… Disco FEVER??? He hasn’t been on the show in a few weeks now. Welcome back, not-very-good-human-being. Disco is out here trying to sell copies of his CD. What a joke, put that thing up on iTunes my dude. What you think this is? The 90s? Get outta here with that. Regardless, Eddie Guerrero comes out next to quickly save us from Disco Inferno. God bless. During his entrance, we get a shot of a kid in the crowd looking completely un-amused. That kid is probably between twenty-five and thirty years old right now. I wonder what he’s up to these days. Out next is Flair, who is being accompanied by Brian Pillman. Flair, however, is in street clothes, while Pillman is in his ring gear. Something is up!
Flair grabs a mic and explains what’s happening here. He basically says that he’s above wrestling Eddie Guerrero and that he’s focused on The Stinger. He then says that Anderson and Benoit have fueled the jet, and they’re ready to go once Pillman takes care of Guerrero. He then attempts to strut away but gets stopped by Eddie. Hilarious. Flair now exits, and this one is underway.
Eddie Guerrero vs. Brian Pillman
Oh boy, right off the bat here Brian Pillman is being… uh… Brian Pillman-like, using his red jacket to try and attract Eddie over, and Eddie is not amused one bit. Pillman throws up the four fingers in Eddie’s face, who slaps them away, only to be met with a slap to the face himself. Collar and elbow tie-up into the corner to start us off, which ends with a clean break. Pillman then lights up Eddie’s chest with some chops. Pillman shoots Eddie off but gets met with a kick to the face. Eddie then climbs the ropes to hit a big reverse hurricanrana-type-maneuver there to Pillman, and he quickly follows that up with a standing dropkick, and then a slap for good measure. Get Wrecked. Eddie with a punch, and then a back suplex, dropping Pillman right on his head. He takes his time to head to the top rope, however on his way down he gets met with a dropkick from Pillman. All the while on commentary, Bobby Heenan is going on about how all he ever gets asked about is Eddie Guerrero, and how he’s sick of it. He also called him a “ham and egger” which is a throwback. Pillman runs Eddie’s head across the top rope and then starts… biting at him. Man, Brian Pillman really was unique. He then mounts Eddie and chokes him out using the bottom rope, until he gets off to look into the camera and say “I love you man” followed by laughter. What in the hell.
Pillman bounces Eddie’s face off the top turnbuckle, then nails him with a right hand. He follows that up by shooting Eddie off the ropes, which Eddie uses to his advantage, turning his momentum into a roll-up pin, for only a two count. I do want to point out that I clearly saw Brian whispering into Eddie’s ear before the Irish whip. They’re EXPOSING THE BUSINESS. Pillman slams Guerrero face first into the mat from a standing position. Eddie fights back soon after however until he gets dropped with a back body drop by The Loose Cannon. Two quick two-count pinfall attempts there for Pillman follow. Brian now saying things to Eddie that we can’t quite hear. It kind of looks like he’s challenging him to get up. Which he does, until he gets suplexed by Pillman. Then he’s back down again. Pillman tries for a cover but gets another two count. He then sets up Eddie in the corner for a knife-edge chop, and he immediately gets hit back by Eddie with an open hand chop. No thank you, sir. I’ll be having none of that this evening. More chops follow by Eddie until Pillman jabs him in the eye, which allows for Pillman to hit a snap mare into a chinlock. Eddie is eventually able to escape, however, he gets caught with a powerslam after getting shot off the ropes. That powerslam yields an increasingly angry Brian Pillman with another two count.
The Loose Cannon is mocking Eddie here, telling him to “come on” and get up, while constantly pushing his face to knock him back down to the mat. He then spits into Guerrero’s face, which sparks the fire in Eddie, as he performs a double-leg takedown to Pillman, and the raining punches follow. Flyin’ Brian tries to escape to the apron, where he gets caught by Eddie Guerrero. However, Brian is able to counter Eddie’s suplex with a suplex of his own, and down to the outside goes Guerrero. Pillman then goes to the second rope on the outer part of the ring, and launches himself off, however, Guerrero was able to get out of the way just in time, sending Brian Pillman ribs first into the ringside barricade. Oh my god. Brian once again tries to escape, this time up the ramp area, however, Eddie Guerrero leaps off the top rope onto Pillman with a beautiful crossbody, and DOWN. GOES. PILLMAN. What a match this has been. Back in the ring, The Loose Cannon begs for mercy, but he will get none of that from Eddie Guerrero here. After some quick exchanges and reversals, Eddie manages to land a huge brainbuster. Up goes Guerrero to the top rope for presumably a Frog Splash, but before he can hit, he gets crotched on the ropes by Pillman.
Eddie Guerrero is now in trouble as Brian Pillman is up on the second rope, perhaps calling for a superplex, however before he can connect, he gets knocked off by Eddie. This allows Eddie to take advantage with a Frog Splash! He hit it! ONE, TWO, THREE! Holy crap, Eddie won! That was extremely unexpected. Man oh man. A++ ending my friends. That was fantastic.
Match Rating: 3 stars
I’m really loving this WCW version of underdog Eddie Guerrero. Kudos to Pillman as well for taking the loss there.
Before we head to our next commercial break, we have Bobby Heenan telling us to not go away. Somebody howled too right before the screen went to black, and it sounded exactly like the start of the NWO Wolfpac theme song. Now, maybe I’ve been playing too much 2K lately, but that’s definitely what I heard. Regardless, we also see what our next match-up is going to be.
Ah yes, the second part in a series that nobody asked for. Any bets on Disco Inferno getting involved again? Probably not, since he agitated Eddie Guerrero earlier tonight. Whatever, as long as this match finally happens so we can move on.
We get a look at what’s going to go down on WCW Saturday Night, which is not very much. Luger will be wrestling in the main event, and we’ll get appearances from Bill DeMott, VK Wallstreet, and Disco Inferno. Boy, I’ve gotta tune in and see what Hugh Morris is up to. *MAJOR EYE ROLL*
For whatever reason, we get a super long shot of the crowd, and I happen to see one guy who tears the head off of a Hulk Hogan foam finger type of thing. I have so many questions. Mainly, was it his? And if so, why buy it and then destroy it? Maybe he was drunk. Maybe he was a secret Sting fan and decided to tell the world in the most dramatic way possible. I have no idea, but it’s not important, so who cares. We get a replay of what happened last week to the Macho Man Randy Savage when the Dungeon of Doom attacked his arm. Why? Don’t ask me why. I just want to see the Big Boss Man. And soon after I write that, here he comes! You’ve gotta love it, Maggle.
Road Warrior Hawk vs. Big Bubba Rogers
Here is Captain No-Sell McWarrior himself, Hawk. He does his pose on the ropes, then goes to the outside to assault Big Bubba before the match begins! Guys, it literally happened again. Twice in one episode. This is no longer a joke, this has become a serious problem. Hawk with some right hands before he throws Boss Man into the ring to get this one officially started. Hawk shoots him off the ropes and connects with a hands free back body drop! Very cool looking. Road Warrior Hawk with a big clothesline, and now Big Bubba is begging for mercy. He tries to kick Hawk, but Hawk catches his leg. He tries again, and Hawk catches the other leg. Big Bubba is now completely screwed. Well done, chap. Hawk throws Bubba up into the air by his feet, then slams him down hard, and now he’s on the attack with some mounted punches. Referee Nick Patrick gets Hawk to back away, however, while that was happening, Big Bubba loaded something into his pocket. Will that come into play soon? We’ll have to wait and see. In the meantime, Hawk returns over to Bubba to lay him out with a suplex, before heading to the top rope for a splash, which misses.
Big Bubba takes advantage with some pretty loud strikes to the face and midsection. He then tries for a Stinger Splash, but… he kind of gets it? Hawk took the brunt of that move, yet at the same time, he pretty much no-sold it. I think he moved out of the way too late. More loaded punches by Bubba, until he attempts a bearhug (please no), which is thwarted by Hawk and his own fists of doom. Hawk hits a running clothesline which does not take Bubba down. He tries for another, but this time gets met with a spinebuster for his troubles. Bubba goes for a cover, and only gets a two count. He then sets up Hawk on the middle rope for a crotch-splash. Rogers moves to the outside of the ring to continue his attack, however, Hawk nails him with a right. It doesn’t take long for Boss Man to regain control in the ring soon after. He shoots Hawk from one corner to the next, then the big men end up bumping heads, and now they’re both down. Hawk is the first man back to his feet, and he heads for the top rope. He attempts a single-man Doomsday Device, however Big Bubba is able to sidestep just in time. Bubba then pulls out a flute, or something that looks like a flute, and tapes it to his hand. He tries to use it in an attack, but Jim Duggan randomly appears and trips him up, causing him to fall face first into his own fist. Hawk takes advantage, one, two, three, this one is finished.
Match Rating: Ugh.
1980’s WWF is out in full force tonight. For god’s sake.
Up next is the big one! Sting vs. Hogan. Friend vs. Foe. Camaraderie vs. Paranoia. Headbanger Sting vs. Baby Daddy Hogan. Let’s freakin’ go.
Sting makes his entrance first, wearing red and yellow. Everybody is out in these streets mocking Hulk Hogan. It’s quite amazing. I see a sign at ringside that says “Sting is the big dog” which is a reference to Sting’s promo from last week. It’ll never not be funny to me though. It’s a shame we’ll never get Sting vs. Roman Reigns in a Battle of the Big Dogs. Maybe Roman will wrestle Dakota Kai one day though. Y’never know…. anything is possible. Hogan’s music plays next, and out comes… Randy Savage, who’s in an arm sling. He then proceeds to run right into the pyro that comes up from the rampway. Oh my god, that was hilarious. After a really long stalling period, we see Hamburglar Hogan emerge from the crowd, still wearing that stupid mask from last week. He pokes Sting to alert him that he’s standing there and then takes off the mask. Woohoo, progress. We get a pretty epic stare-down until Hogan shoves Sting. The bell rings, and here we go. It’s main event time.
Sting vs. Hulk Hogan
Sting is having none of that shoving BS, as he goes on the attack, and it’s a quick pace. Hogan can’t keep up, nor can he hold onto his bandanna, as it comes off, revealing his shiny head. Like the kingfish dude from the first SpongeBob Squarepants Movie. Hogan looks huge next to Sting, and I think that says a lot because Sting himself is no small man. Holy crap. Hogan turns the tides in his favor with a clothesline in the corner after he Irish whipped Sting. Now Hogan’s going in with strikes and such, as the crowd noticeably boos. That’s kind of surprising. I can’t believe they’re not digging cowboy-boot-street-thug Hogan. After a ton of punches, Hogan attempts his famous clothesline/leg drop combo, but he cannot complete it as Sting jumps up and gives him a dropkick. DOWN. GOES. HOGAN. The Stinger hits another dropkick, and this time sends Hulk Hogan over the top rope and out to the floor. PERHAPS WE’RE GETTING A PREVIEW OF WORLD WAR 3 HERE???? No, but still, that was cool. I mean, it was no Maven eliminating The Undertaker, but it was cool nonetheless. Hulk Hogan pulls his sore loser card as he pulls Sting out the ring to attack him. Sting was just doing his “WOOOO” shtick in the ring. How dare you, Hulk Hogan.
The Hulkster sends Sting into the ringside barricade, then follows it up with a big suplex onto the padded ringside area. Eric Bischoff on commentary is talking about how close Sting and Hogan used to be. How when WCW signed Hogan, Sting was there. Hogan and Sting do some weird… clothesline type of thing. I believe it was botched. Hulk then rakes The Stinger’s back and again tries for the clothesline into the boot, however, Sting is able to hit a crossbody for a two count. Hulk with some actual wrestling now. Some hold trading, even a drop toe hold. FROM HULK HOGAN. IN AMERICA. ‘Cause we all know he can wrestle, he did so in Japan, but this, this is all new to us. Hogan now with a friggin’ cross armbreaker. This is unreal. I feel like I’ve entered an alternate reality. Just noticed one side of Hulk Hogan’s tights says “Giant Killer.” Interesting. Sting is able to get his arm free, and now it is he who has an arm hold locked in. After Hogan has words with Savage mid-armbar, he turns things around with a Masterlock on Sting and then transitions into a side headlock. This is madness. Eat your heart out Benoit/Malenko/Guerrero/etc. y’all can’t touch the motherfreaking Hulkster. Sting tries his best to break out of this side headlock to no avail. Hogan soon flips over and turns it into a laying side headlock, which Sting reverses into a pinfall attempt. That attempt yields a two count, as Hogan flips back into control.
Stings manages to get Hulkster into a corner, where Hogan is forced to break his hold. Sting is now attacking Hogan’s legs, which is smart if you think about it. No legs means no leg drop. The Stinger sets up Hogan for that Stinger Splash, but he gets caught in a bearhug! No! Oh my goodness, Sting you’ve gotta escape. Hogan, out of the goodness of his heart, let’s Sting out, not wanting Stinger to suffer the same fate that he did at Halloween Havoc. He kicks Sting in the gut, and then finally nails that running clothesline, for only a two count though. Hogan with a back suplex and a two count. He then hits a regular suplex on Sting for yet another two count. Sting fights back with some more attacks to the leg until he finally gets Hogan off his feet, and he’s able to lock in a leg lock. STING SWITCHES INTO A SCORPION DEATH LOCK! Ahhhhhhhhhhh. No way Hogan taps out, right? RIGHT???? Boo, Hogan hulks up and manages to power out of it. What an awful showing for Sting right there. Hogan uses mystical powers and he’s able to break out of the Death Lock easily. Two years later The Undertaker summons all of his body strength to escape Bret Hart’s Sharpshooter, yet he still wasn’t able to break Bret’s grip.
Hulk Hogan goes through his no selling shtick. Punch, punch, clothesline, leg drop, NOPE! Sting moved out of the way. Take that, you shiny headed bastard. STING LOCKS IN THE SCORPION DEATH LOCK AGAIN! WILL HOGAN TAP? Not yet, as he’s crying to the ref that Sting’s going to break his leg. Hey, isn’t that what someone was gonna pay Iron Sheik to do in the match where Hogan won the WWF title for the first time? Anyways, this one gets ended abruptly as the Dungeon of Doom make their way down to attack both participants. Lame.
Match Rating: 3 stars
The Hulkster and Sting clean house, until The Giant and Jimmy Hart arrive. Giant goes to chokeslam both men at the same time, however, he gets thwarted by Randy Savage, who attacks with a steel chair. Giant, as a result, turns his attention to the Macho Man, and delivers a devastating chokeslam. He then turns around into a chair-clothesline from the combined powers of Sting and Hogan, which is enough to drive the big man over the top rope and down to the ground.
When we come back from a commercial break we see The Taskmaster and Jimmy Hart at the commentary table, both rocking Bobby Heenan back and forth. Oh my goodness, that’s quite funny. We close out the show with commentary freaking out about what’s gonna happen on Sunday at World War 3.
That was certainly a show. A pretty good go-home show. We got Hogan and Sting in a neat little technical wrestling match. Eddie Guerrero getting a pretty big win over Brian Pillman, and…. that’s about it. Understandable though, as they’re saving all the big stuff for the PPV. Either way, it was still a good show. Can’t wait to see who comes out on Nitro next week as the new WCW World Champion.
Until then, I am JeriKane, and this is the WCW Nitro Saga.